Living with chronic pain can bring up emotions you never expected. Frustration, sadness, worry, disappointment—and sometimes several of them before you’ve even finished your morning coffee.

I know what it’s like to have a day planned in your mind, only to discover that your body has something entirely different in mind.

And sometimes, the hardest part isn’t changing the plan. It’s dealing with how you feel about having to change it.

But here’s something I’ve learned: having difficult emotions doesn’t mean you’re handling chronic pain poorly. It means you’re having a very human response to something that affects your everyday life.

You can be grateful for the good things in your life and still feel disappointed about something you’ve missed. You can love your family and still need time alone. You can be hopeful about tomorrow and frustrated with today.

Those feelings can exist together.

I’ve also learned that I don’t have to solve every emotion the moment it appears. Sometimes I just need to recognize what I’m feeling instead of criticizing myself for feeling it.

And sometimes, simply being able to say, “Today has been harder than I expected,” makes it easier to move forward.

Something to remember: Your emotions are part of your experience, but they don’t have to become your identity.

You are still you—even on the complicated days.